I've been finding songs with lyrics I can relate to lately. They all just happen to be years old. I plan to memorize the lyrics to all those songs, so I can do something that means something to me. There's this one with lyrics hit me particularly called Blame It on the Rain by Milli Vanilli.
You said you didn't need her. You told her goodbye. You sacrificed a good love to satisfy your pride.
Those are some of the first lines of the song. The rest of the words continue to speak directly to me. And the advice given in the main verse?
Whatever you do, don't put the blame on you.
If only. The best I can do right now is not think about my regret. The majority of my thoughts are about us. Through a combination of effort and luck many of those thoughts are about the good times we've had, the things I love about you, and how I'll continue to strive so that you'll talk to me again. I've been thinking about all the things I'll do for you. Like, why didn't I really ever sing to you? I'm a good vocalist, I love singing, and I love you, so why the hell not? I guess I just never thought you'd like to listen. There's so many things that I assumed I couldn't do or you wouldn't care about. I'm not going to think like that anymore, just do things I think would be nice and hope you appreciate it.
One thing about Blame It on the Rain, though, is that I don't quite like the vocal notes. If the tune were different, I could sing that song and really feel like it's for me. I'm trying to come up with a corruption to drive off some of the unicorns and rainbows. The first thing that has come to mind for inspiration is Nirvana. I'm trying to imagine how Nirvana would have covered the song, what tones would have come from Kurt Cobain's throat. Some parts of that image are pretty vivid for me, but I think I need to really dissect some Nirvana melodies to get anywhere. I'll be really happy when I can make Blame It on the Rain my song, if you can understand that.
Yeah, I know that Kurt Cobain committed suicide. I'm not idolizing him for that reason. According to his suicide letter, he took his life because he just couldn't care about what he did or about others at all, even though he knew that he (was supposed to have) loved them. I may feel very similar, but there is one very important difference: I will always care about you. I'd say that sets me very far apart from him. Then there's the lack of fame and fortune, but those are unimportant details! Heheh.
Let me sing Blame It on the Rain for you sometime, okay?
