I've been very forthright with people. When I have complaints about what they do, I haven't been holding back. I come off as ungrateful when they've done me a favor but done it wrong. Well, I am pretty ungrateful, after all; I would be grateful if I were well, but how can you be grateful about something that doesn't mean anything?
It isn't like I want to hurt someone. It isn't as though I believe unbridled honesty will always do less harm than good. It's mainly that I feel so misunderstood and I say everything too clearly to make up for that. Sometimes I've complained repeatedly and somehow the other person still hasn't gotten it. One option is to stop accepting that person's actions by ignoring them or by not asking for them. The other is to simply be more blunt.
I don't feel like this is a huge issue for me. When I'm better I'll just say, "I was depressed and apathetic. Being so rude isn't who I really am." I can't get away with everything just by blaming depression, but I think that's an understandable argument. You would always be clear about your feelings because that was your way of showing your love. You've hurt me a lot in the past with that thinking. When I'm clear I also hurt people. Yet I've learned that some things need to be out in the open, for my own good.
I hope you feel like you're well-understood. Don't be too frustrated if you aren't. One can never be fully understood neither by oneself nor by another.
