Sides

Yes, there are definitely sides to this situation. But it isn't you against me. One side pushes for isolation and fear, while the other wants understanding and mediation. It's basically "they're unwell and shouldn't be in contact" against "they're concerned and could help each other". I think I know now who's on what side. It's painful to even know that these sides exist, really. I wish we could all just work together to truly help you. But of course that isn't possible when it's ignorance versus enlightenment.

I like to solve problems by hearing out the different sides, picking apart their views, then coming to a reasonable compromise. It's the prior side's view that any interaction between you and me will hurt you, and that I will eventually simply get over you. It's the latter side's view that interaction between you and me can heal both of us. My compromise is that I'm giving you space until you feel comfortable enough to talk to me again. The problem is that the prior camp has dragged you and others in, and with their influence we may never be able to recover. I want the latter side to have some sort of similar influence, but nobody is strong enough to make that happen.

This side of enlightenment feels lonely, honestly. Most of the people involved with us have chosen ignorance. Maybe it shouldn't be so surprising. I feel that people generally choose ignorance very often. However, then there are the people who regularly read these messages. They're clearly trying to understand, and hopefully they know that what's happening isn't right. So, I know that I'm not the only one on this side after all. I'm grateful for the support.

One day, you'll be on the right side of things again. I will be right beside you, with all my heart.

Bad people

Before the court hearing, your grandfather told my mother that he'd given me his number so that I could talk to him. My mother warned me not to talk to him, or he'd use it against me. So, I avoided calling him... until today. I told him that I wanted to talk about you.

If you contact me or anyone else about her, I will get her to file against you as being in contempt of the court. Bye.

I weakly asked him to hold on. He hung up.

He said he would get you to file... they really have been the puppeteers behind this whole thing, after all. If he were to tell you simply that I'm talking about you, you wouldn't do anything. But he would urge you in addition that you need to take action against me. I really wanted to think that he was a good person. That you were wrong all those years when you said that your grandparents were heartless, and that my mom was wrong when she said that I couldn't trust your grandfather. But no, he really is a bad person, isn't he? I don't like labeling people as bad. I want to understand them. But what I understand is that you're nothing more than an heir to them. All those times they called you fat and wouldn't gift you things that would help your life, they really were trying to mold you into someone worthy of being their granddaughter. They alienated you because they thought that made you independent and strong, but instead it made you clingy and weak. And I guess that's what they're trying to do to me, too, by manipulating you into this. Horrible. Just horrible.

All I wanted to talk about was the realization I came to yesterday. I wanted to warn him that you've been depressed all this time because you're so disconnected. I wanted to ask for him and your grandmother to spend as much time as they could with you, and to make you feel more loved. So what happened instead is painfully ironic. What's more painful is that I know now that they aren't helping you.

We're good people, though. Somehow, someday, we will repair this.