When I'm not lying to and distracting myself, I listen to a YouTube playlist of songs that describe my feelings and situation quite accurately. I titled it They Sing the Words I Can't Find. Sometimes I try to memorize their lyrics so that I can sing them to you someday. But I've encountered a pretty big problem in doing that: while I'm singing the lyrics, I get too emotional. I lose my concentration, and my singing becomes more of a wail. Sometimes I have to stop and cry. Other times I continue singing badly because tears refuse to come. Every time, I just give up on memorizing lyrics.
Well, maybe eventually I'll memorize them. Eventually I'll be able to sing them without breaking down.
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