Well, that's what blogging is all about, isn't it? It's a whole lot of writing. This makes the 178th message, 2 messages for nearly every day since I've started. Some messages are a few sentences, and some are a few paragraphs. The one I just wrote was a few paragraphs. I don't think this message will come near a match to that.
I have so much to tell you. Well, if you've read everything up to now, then I had so much to tell you. You had a whole lot to read, in that case. I'm so grateful if you've read it all. I'm grateful if you've just read a little. Thank you for putting in any effort at all to understand what I've been dealing with. Not just the simple synopsis of, "You broke a relationship, now you can't let her go. Soldiers and the poverty-stricken have much worse problems than you." Actually trying to understand how I feel, or how I can't feel, and how I'm trying to understand and manage that. Understanding how depression and suicidal thoughts aren't helped by abandonment, and how holding on to even the most unrealistic threads of hope can help to bring a person out of their personal hell. I know there's so much more to understand, too, but I'm not trying to list off what I think you should be getting from this.
For all the effort that I put into my messages, I am grateful for the effort you put into reading and comprehending them. Whoever is reading, thank you so much.
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