I don't feel that I accomplished enough today. I spent the whole day coding in Java, but I don't feel like what I ended up with is really much. To be sure, it doesn't do anything yet that anyone would care about. I feel like I wasted a lot of time trying to figure out how to solve a tiny little problem. At least I understand how I solved it. I can apply what I've learned in the future, surely.
I've been thinking about my perception of time a lot lately. I've spent months in depression, and most days seem like forever in burden. Looking back is strange. It feels like everything before we broke up was just a snap. Remembering the months after that feels tedious, but that time is also tightly bound by that tedious difficulty I have experienced. Even trying to figure out how I feel about remembering brings me down.
Today was a snap. It didn't feel like more than an hour. One factor could be that absolutely nobody talked to me in any way. Another would be that I had music playing: the Minecraft OST as usual, and the ~ songs on my computer. Many of my ~ songs are anime soundtracks I've gotten from you. They make me smile.
If my words don't seem so composed here, it's because I don't feel like my head is all into English right now. It's still in Java programming mode, haha. I'm going to pull an all-nighter and keep programming. I'll push off the next message for tomorrow. I'll write before I go to sleep. Programming isn't the only reason that I plan to stay up, though. A friend across the world is seeing a therapist for the first time, so I'm staying up to offer support. My friend it quite nervous about it and needs the encouragement.
That's all I have for today. Hope your days have been meaningful. Take care.
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